Here’s How to Fight With Depression and Regain Your Purpose

September 19, 2022 Comments Off blog, Depression

A harsh breakup, grief over a lost loved one, disappointment and unmet expectations… We all sometimes feel blue, down, and unhappy for different reasons. We often describe these feelings as being “depressed,” but depression is not always the case.

If you’ve experienced what major depressive disorder feels like, you can already understand the difference. It changes not merely the way you feel but also the way you think, the way you act, and the way you function on an entirely physical level.

Although harsh and complex to manage, depression is still treatable if you recognize and address the problem. So below, you’ll see our brief guide on how to fight with depression and regain your feeling of purpose and self-worth.

What is Depression – Facts and Stats

As we already mentioned above, depression is very different from the natural feelings of sadness or gloom we all might occasionally experience. In fact, clinical depression is classified as a serious medical illness, taking up to 850,000 lives every year when not addressed adequately.

Put in a nutshell – depression is a mood disorder that manifests itself in persistent sadness, loss of purpose, worsened self-image, and loss of interest in things that once made the person joyful and excited. It can also evolve to include physical symptoms such as worsened sleep patterns, changes in appetite, lack of energy, and difficult concentration.

The latest data shows that one in six people will have depressive episodes during their lifetime. Every year, one in five adults is affected by depression, and a mind-blowing 50% of them are also diagnosed with anxiety.

The highest depression disorder rates are measured in individuals between 18 and 25 years old, where women are more prone to get depressed than men.

Where Does Depression Affect the Brain?

The growing awareness and classification of depression as a severe medical condition triggers extensive research. Recently, science has turned its eyes toward how depression actually affects the brain physically. So, here are the findings published so far:

It’s been observed that people with depression experience shrinkage in several parts of the brain, thus losing gray matter volume. The most affected areas were the hippocampus, the thalamus, the Caudate nucleus, and the prefrontal cortex.
From a structural point of view, abnormalities have been discovered in all three parts of the brain – the prefrontal neocortex, the limbic brain, and the reptilian complex.
Along with regional brain abnormalities, circuit-level connectivity models have also been proven to get worse in depression sufferers.

The pathophysiology of depression is far from well-explored, leaving medical scientists with food for extensive future research and investigation.

How Do People Fight with Depression?

You can suspect depression if you live through more than two weeks of overpowering sadness, loss of interest, and deviations in how you perceive yourself. However, symptoms such as impaired sleep, appetite changes, and cognitive tribulation can also be attributed to different endocrine and neurological problems. So you’d probably want to cross these out as a first step after suspecting depression.

Generally, your strategy for diagnosing and battling depression should include the following essential steps:

Thoroughly checking your physical health and making sure your symptoms are not driven by any medical conditions or nutritional deficiencies;
Sharing your concerns with family, close relatives, or friends in order to get timely support in your efforts to recover;
Trying to fight depression at your own pace by challenging negative thoughts, practicing mindfulness, and trying to engage in pleasurable activities;
Further supporting your efforts with different professionally designed apps, games, and mental fitness exercises on a daily basis;
Reaching out to a mental health professional to get a personalized assessment and continuous guidance in your journey back towards yourself.

Battling depression cannot be an easily generalized process, as the experience can be very different for every individual. Whatever the case, though, you are highly recommended to dig deeper and find the root trigger for depression occurring in the first place. Potential reasons could be past trauma, persistent stress, alcohol or substance abuse, or family history. Either way, overcoming the causes with the help of a therapist is just as necessary as managing the symptoms themselves.

How Can I Clear My Depression?

If you need some ideas on how to challenge depression and begin feeling yourself again, here they come:

Educate yourself about depression. Knowing the fundamentals of the condition will help you build your strategy for overcoming it successfully. Moreover – it will help you comprehend the changes you’re experiencing and regain confidence that recovery is totally achievable.
Set small daily goals. Loss of motivation might get in the way of your everyday life, so start with small things and gradually challenge yourself each day. Sometimes, even taking out the trash can be a win.
Try to exercise. It can definitely be challenging to bring yourself to exercise when you are barely able to leave the bed. Anyway, remember that movement immediately releases happiness hormones and literally helps your brain rewire.
Keep an eye on your diet. As we already mentioned, depression can trigger emotional eating and drastic changes in appetite. If you’re experiencing this, you can try to replace fast and junk food with fruits, nuts, or probiotic foods as often as you can.
Spend time in nature. You’ve surely felt the incredible effect nature produces on your mood at least once in your lifetime. So right now, you need that boost more than ever before. Science has confirmed the impact of green and blue environments on emotional well-being, so pack up and hit the woods!
Keep a journal. Channeling your subjective perceptions and abstract thoughts into words will give you a different perspective right away. In the long term, your journal will help you recognize patterns, spot triggers, and understand your own self better.
Answer that call. Depression often goes hand in hand with isolation and intentional exclusion from your social circle. You don’t need to attend parties and force yourself to smile. It’s just enough to invite your best friend over for a quiet movie night and binge-watch your comfort show together.
Find your way forward. We often dream of finding a way back to normal. But what if the only way is forward? As counterintuitive as it may sound, depression can push you toward reexploring yourself. It’s your journey to walk, so there is no fixed direction. You can make it spiritual, express yourself through art, or finally take up that absurd hobby you’ve always been postponing for later in life.

Last but not least – keep yourself away from alcohol and recreational drug use during your depression recovery. The momentary improvement is often followed by a massive drop in emotional health, and the long-term effects will never be in your favor.

Beat Depression: Quotes to Lift You Up

To round out your recovery inspiration, we’ve picked some powerful quotes on depression that will help you rethink your position and step out of the deadlock.

“It’s not all bad. Heightened self-consciousness, apartness, an inability to join in, physical shame and self-loathing—they are not all bad. Those devils have been my angels. Without them I would never have disappeared into language, literature, the mind, laughter and all the mad intensities that made and unmade me.”
― Stephen Fry

“Listen to the people who love you. Believe that they are worth living for even when you don’t believe it. Seek out the memories depression takes away and project them into the future. Be brave; be strong; take your pills. Exercise because it’s good for you even if every step weighs a thousand pounds. Eat when food itself disgusts you. Reason with yourself when you have lost your reason.”
― Andrew Solomon

“Take a shower, wash off the day. Drink a glass of water. Make the room dark. Lie down and close your eyes. Notice the silence. Notice your heart. Still beating. Still fighting. You made it, after all. You made it, another day. And you can make it one more. You’re doing just fine.”
― Charlotte Eriksson

“Perhaps depression is caused by asking oneself too many unanswerable questions.”
― Miriam Toews

“Depression is your body saying, ‘I don’t want to be this character anymore. I don’t want to hold up this avatar that you’ve created in the world. It’s too much for me. You should think of the word ‘depressed’ as ‘deep rest.’ Your body needs to be depressed. It needs deep rest from the character that you’ve been trying to play.”
— Jim Carrey

“Sometimes, life will kick you around, but sooner or later, you realize you’re not just a survivor. You’re a warrior, and you’re stronger than anything life throws your way.”
— Brooke Davis

“Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack, a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.”
— Leonard Cohen

“I wonder if that’s how darkness wins, by convincing us to trap it inside ourselves, instead of emptying it out. I don’t want it to win.”
― Jasmine Warga

“Though I am often in the depths of misery, there is still calmness, pure harmony and music inside me. I see paintings or drawings in the poorest cottages, in the dirtiest corners. And my mind is driven towards these things with an irresistible momentum.”
― Vincent van Gogh

“In the middle of winter I at last discovered that there was in me an invincible summer.”
— Albert Camus

“If you desire healing,
let yourself fall ill
let yourself fall ill.”
― Rumi

The Pressure for Self-Care: It Should Not Be a Chore

September 19, 2022 Comments Off anxiety, blog, Workplace

Self-care is a multifaceted process of engaging in strategies that promote overall well-being. It essentially involves conscious and intentional acts that one takes to promote their physical, mental, and emotional well-being. A survey by The Harris Poll found that 64% of Americans are focused on mental health care now more than ever. To prioritize self-care, they have started exploring strategies such as lifestyle changes, stress management, a healthy diet, and regular exercise.

Self-care is essential to building resilience in this fast-paced and anxiety-driven world. Taking steps to care for your mind and body equips you with the energy to live your best life. It could be thought of as recharging your personal battery so you can stay on top of your other priorities and obligations.

The pressures of self-care

Taking care of ourselves in the most basic ways helps us restore balance and find relief from stressors that plague our day-to-day lives. Self-care has been shown to provide a myriad of benefits, such as reducing anxiety and depression, avoiding burnout, and increasing energy and happiness. It also allows us to build a stronger relationship with ourselves and the people around us.
Unfortunately, all this emphasis on prioritizing self-care has brought needless pressure on some people. For some, an hour nap may feel like another chore they need to add to their growing list of responsibilities. For others, a trip to the spa could be just another thing they think they should be doing instead of genuinely finding pleasure and relief from it. Taking time to receive a healthy dose of self-care could stir up feelings of guilt from doing one activity (such as taking a walk in the park) over another (like playing with children). The pressure of doing self-care could also make some people feel like they do not deserve the time off or the relaxation activity. Instead of curbing these feelings, the worrying, anxiety, and stress continue. Today, we’ll discuss how to lessen the pressure for self-care and bring it back to its primary purpose of rest and relaxation.

Making self-care healthy and easy once again

Delegate time for yourself

Self-care doesn’t have to be complicated and shouldn’t take up much of your time. It doesn’t necessarily mean treating yourself to special gifts or activities. Focusing on the basics like sticking to your morning routine of attentive showering or skin care without any distractions can be an essential way to take care of yourself. You can also consider taking advantage of applications that offer small pockets of relaxation through ambient audio as you work through the day. Relaxifyapp’s comprehensive and science-based program is designed to improve your cognitive, physical, social, and emotional well-being. It offers gamified mental health technologies designed by psychologists to provide stress and anxiety relief.

Create healthy physical health goals

Fitness and nutrition are important components of self-care. But, with the advent of social media and the unrealistic expectations of beauty it sets up, it can be difficult to create goals that fit your personal journey. Your physical health goals should be unique, sustainable, and not dictated by external pressures. That is why having a healthy motivation toward losing weight is important—this could include treating yourself with kindness and compassion and focusing on what changes you genuinely want to see in yourself. Taking charge of your fitness journey sustains your motivation for longer and allows you to care for your own body. After all, self-care for physical health should go beyond being concerned with how you look, how you will fit in your clothes, and how other people will perceive you.

Find opportunities to socialize

Although we may picture self-care as involving activities you do alone, it doesn’t have to be a lonely journey. However, maintaining social relationships is a critical aspect of self-care. Having close connections with others is vital for our well-being. In fact, we tackled in our blog how powerful physical touch such as cuddling and hugging could be for our physical health. Socialization doesn’t necessarily mean reaching out to people outside your immediate circles—it could be as easy as playing with your children, having date nights with your partner, or meeting up with a friend you haven’t seen in a while. When it all becomes too overwhelming, developing boundaries as you interact with your friends and family could also be the building blocks of good self-care. When self-care becomes a tedious activity, it fails to serve its purpose. As with any other activity in your health journey, it’s essential to assess where you’re at in your self-care process and whether there are things you can improve to create positive and more meaningful changes in yourself.

How to Stop an Anxiety Attack?

August 17, 2022 Comments Off blog

In a SingleCare survey carried out in 2020, 62% of respondents declared that they have been experiencing some degree of anxiety. Meanwhile, the Anxiety and Depression Association of America estimates that 31% of all adults will suffer an anxiety disorder at some point in their life. Finally, a report by The World Health Organization points out that 264 million adults around the globe have persistent anxiety.

So, if you’ve been battling fear, nervous tension, and panic attack episodes, you’re far from alone in fighting this battle. In fact, you are sharing it with millions of people of all ages, genders, social statuses, and cultural backgrounds.

Today, we are giving a little background to the subject of anxiety — what triggers it, how to recognize it, and how to battle it according to science.

What Triggers Anxiety?

What we call by the common term “anxiety” actually falls into different groups and stages.

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) is the most common anxiety disorder, followed by panic disorder, phobia-related disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder. All of these conditions have to do with severe anxiety episodes that can reoccur for days, months, and even years.

Different forms of anxiety can have different reasons and genesis. According to psychologists, some of the most common triggers of anxiety are:

Problematic experiences in childhood, adolescence, or adulthood;
Physical or emotional abuse;
Being neglected in your family or losing a parent;
Bullying or being socially excluded;
Having an underlying mental or physical condition;
Substance abuse;
Prolonged stress and exhaustion;
Unhealthy home or working environment;
Pressure, habitual burnout,
Having a toxic spouse or family member, etc.

Or else said — difficult life circumstances can take their toll, and you can’t always expect to go through them fully untouched. Be it consciously or not, you will always have your triggers, and your reaction to them can vary from mild to severe, depending on different internal and external factors.

What are the First Signs of Anxiety?

It may be a cliche, but the fast-paced urban living itself presupposes a certain level of anxiety in our everyday lives. Noise pollution, unbalanced nutrition, and unnatural sleeping patterns are a very common set of prerequisites that trigger a purely physical reaction of being stressed, feeling tense, and having difficulties being your most balanced self. That’s why making a conscious effort to improve your mental health status is compulsory, and neglecting what your body tells you can quickly escalate into developing long-term anxiety.

There is a long list of red flags you should keep an eye on to recognize that things may have gone too far. And some of them include:

Feeling weak, tired, and fatigued for prolonged periods;
Feeling restless, tense, or nervous for no particular reason;
Experiencing irritation, mood swings, or unexplainable bitterness;
Having trouble with focus, concentration, and memory;
Having persistent headaches or stomach problems;
Feeling out of control with your emotions and reactions;
Having troubles falling or staying asleep;
Having an irrational feeling of danger or doom;
Experiencing sudden hyperventilation or an increased heart rate;
Having episodes of unexplainable sweating or trembling;
Being too self-conscious and having low self-esteem;
Feeling irrational guilt and damaged self-image, etc.

At first, you may ignore many of these symptoms as “accidental” or “normal.” However, the first step towards addressing the problem is recognizing that there is nothing normal in feeling down in your everyday life. So, if you’ve been neglecting the hints, it’s probably about time you face them and begin healing.

How Long Do Anxiety Attacks Last?

At some point, overlooked anxiety has the potential to quickly escalate into repetitive anxiety attacks. And these can seriously worsen your quality of life.

Anxiety attacks (also known as panic attacks) are sudden outbreaks of intense panic or fear. They can have a very specific trigger, or they can storm in straight out of the blue. But, no matter the cause, the result remains the same — a dreadful cocktail of emotional and physical symptoms.

During an anxiety attack, the dreadful fear is often accompanied by disorientation, shaking, dizziness, nausea, and an uncontrollable heart rate. Some people also report different and not-so-common manifestations such as mouth dryness, hot flashes, and shortness of breath.

An anxiety attack can last for a brief 10 minutes or up to half an hour. In addition, unnatural tension can build up long before the actual anxiety attack starts — sometimes days in a row. So once you get to know your way of experiencing anxiety attacks, you can take timely steps to prevent the actual crisis.

Is It Possible to Stop an Anxiety Attack?

Experts haven’t found a fully effective way to prevent or stop an anxiety attack midway through. Anyway, controlling the condition is not impossible if you make a conscious effort for both prevention and reaction to the situation.

We keep talking about prevention, as it is virtually your only long-term working solution. It might include professional therapy, a lifestyle change, working on your triggers, or all of them — systematically and thoughtfully.

If the anxiety attack happens to storm in anyway, there are still things you can do to relieve its symptoms and shorten its duration. Learning how to stop anxiety muscle twitching or how to stop anxiety nausea might be challenging, but it pays off.

What are 5 Ways to Calm Down an Anxiety Attack?

Experts recommend different steps for calming down an anxiety attack, depending on your triggers and your symptoms. Normally, getting personalized counseling is the best thing you can do to make sure you’re reacting accordingly.

Still, here is what helps during an anxiety attack for most people:

#1 Recognize What’s Happening

Anxiety attack symptoms can be scary enough to make you think your life is in actual danger. The pounding heart, sweating, shortness of breath, and throat tightness can literally make you believe you’re dying — making the episode even harder to cope with.

Once you know the symptoms, you can learn to recognize them. Once you recognize them, you can learn to understand that they will pass. Anxiety attacks are not life-threatening, although they might feel like such. So, repeating to yourself that this will pass and leave you untouched will always be your first and very best strategy.

#2 Practice Breathing Exercises

You might be tired of hearing to “calm down” and “breathe deeply.” But did you know that deep breathing gives your body signals that it is safe? The reason is purely physiological — your deepest, slowest, and most calmy rhythmic breathing occurs when you’re sleeping. Check out our RelaxifyApp Breathing Exercise.

Practicing breathing exercises is recommended both as a prevention technique and an SOS reaction during an anxiety attack. For example, you can try taking an at least 4-second-long deep breath, then keeping the air in for a few more seconds, and breathing it out slowly and steadily.

#3 Find a Grounding Technique

“Grounding” is not a term strictly reserved for astrologers and esoteric coaches. It literally means staying grounded in reality — a trick that has a lot to do with overcoming irrational episodes of dreading before something non-existent. Check out our RelaxifyApp Guided Body Scan Exercise.

There are plenty of grounding techniques you can try before you find the one that works for you. One of the most common ways to perform your reality check is to focus on a physical object and simply think of it. It can be a necklace, a stone, a leaf, a souvenir, or basically anything. The trick is to focus on its properties, think of its textures, its origins, its meaning, or whatever keeps your thoughts away from the faux menace you’re dealing with.

#4 Walk Away From Where You’re Standing

It’s not just about physically removing yourself from the place that potentially triggered you. It’s about the movement itself — the steady rhythm of your steps, the motion of your body, and the symbolic fact that you’re pushing forward.

As you walk, you can play a chosen mantra on repeat in your head. Repeating a phrase that has a deeper meaning for you can bring you back to your normal condition and help you out of an anxiety attack. It can be an affirmation, a spiritual saying you vibe with, or simply your favorite Star Wars quote. It doesn’t matter, as long as it works for you.

#5 Seek Counseling

If anxiety attacks hit too hard, last for too long, or take too much out of your pleasure in life, counseling might help you find a long-term solution for your difficulties. The underlying reasons for anxiety and panic disorders are successfully addressed with cognitive-behavioral therapy, and your therapist can also recommend a supplementary medical treatment to support the process safely.

At the end of the process, you will have learned not only how to stop an anxiety attack at night or at your workplace. You will know how to prevent the anxiety attack from happening at all — by doing the shadow work needed to overcome what got you there in the first place.

Say goodbye to automatic negative thoughts with your daily exercises in RelaxifyApp! 👋

How to Enjoy Life?

August 5, 2022 Comments Off blog

Do you have the feeling that something’s always standing in the way between you and real happiness? It’s probably an overloaded working schedule, a dull routine, a few extra pounds you see in the mirror, or just a strange longing for something that’s always just around the corner…

People tend to focus way more on what they’re missing instead of what they have right here, right now. That perpetual strive for the past far gone, or the future far ahead keeps us detached from the present moment. And the present moment is the only real thing we can experience and enjoy.

So, should we work on changing the circumstances? Should we work on changing our perspective? Or should we do both? Here are our thoughts on how to enjoy life – both long-term and short-term.

What Makes a Person Happy in Life?

Happiness is not a concept with a clear and unproblematic explanation, to begin with. In fact, it has been the subject of hundreds of philosophical, psychological, and even physiological research dating back to the dawn of humankind.

According to Plato, only those who are moral may be truly happy in life. Later on, the Cynics believed that happiness arises from abandoning all conventional desires and living a simple life free from all possessions. In the Middle Ages, Thomas Aquinas wrote that true happiness could only be experienced by union with God. Finally, the 20-th century psychiatrist Viktor Frankl stated that one could be truly happy only after one understands and experiences the value of suffering in the name of something bigger than yourself.

Today, happiness is still a matter of one’s own philosophy, values, and mindset. That’s why some people who are seemingly living their best lives still feel unfulfilled, and some people who are seemingly in a bad situation still somehow manage to cherish the moment.

In a nutshell, enjoying life can arise from two fundamental factors. The first is aligning your lifestyle with your inborn values. And the second – learning how to enjoy the moment while you’re still on your way there.

What are the Seven Pleasures of Life?

Learning how to enjoy the life you have here and now is a personal journey; for different people, pleasure arises from different things. For some, it might be silently walking through a tranquil forest. For others, it might be organizing a long movie night with their best friend. And for some, it might be dancing their trouble away in a week-long music festival.

Willard Spiegelman – a professor of English and American literature, has an interesting book called “Seven Pleasures – Essays on Ordinary Happiness.” There, he distinguishes seven different types of everyday pleasures from his point of view, and these are:

Dancing – on your own, in a large crowd, or however you like it;
Reading – in the library, on your favorite sofa, or in your definition of a calming environment;
Walking – in the park, on the beach, or simply through your neighborhood;
Looking – at a leaf of grass, at the sky, or even at your favorite Netflix show;
Listening – to your comfort playlist, to the song of the cricket, or to the voice of your loved one;
Swimming – in the river, in the sea, or in the nearest swimming pool;
Writing – a diary, a poem, or a short story you’d like to tell.

Indulging in these types of simple pleasures is easy and basically free. All you need to do is put conscious effort into appreciating the things you’re already doing, noticing the things that surround you, and “organizing” these little but powerful joy bringers in your daily life.

How Do You Enjoy Life with Simple Things?

General life satisfaction depends on many internal and external factors. It is indeed about having basic security, a healthy living environment, a fulfilling social and romantic life, and a job that inspires and keeps you on track with your values. But it is also about cherishing the things you have and learning to enjoy yourself even when your circumstances are far from your perception of “perfect.”

Learning how to live life happy begins with enjoying the simple pleasures in life. Some of them you already encounter every day but somehow fail to notice. Others you can easily implement into your mindful routine for life appreciation and emotional alignment. And if you need some ideas, here they come!

Practicing gratitude is a good way to alter your perspective and increase your life satisfaction. Yes, you might be feeling mad at your child for spilling their cup of milk on the carpet. But make sure you kiss them on the forehead and feel grateful for having them late in the evening when they fall asleep.
Practicing mindfulness is not an eastern-yoga-esoteric thing to do. It’s your effort to notice, become aware of, and let yourself be sincerely amazed by the grandeur of what surrounds you. If you raise your gaze from the pavement, you might see the crown of the trees swinging in the wind or the silver moonlight brushing the skyscrapers. And that’s beautiful, isn’t it?
Putting yourself first is not selfishness; it’s self-care. Leave the dishes unwashed tonight and head for a walk outside. Leave the laundry alone and grab a book you’ve been planning to read for ages. Ask for help, share responsibilities with household members, and treat yourself like you would advise your child to treat themselves one day. It’s liberating!
Taking proper rest is a must if you want your body and mind to function properly. Built-up stress and tension will take their toll, making you feel not quite yourself at some point. So – don’t use your day off to do more work. Instead, book a massage, take your ten minutes for deep muscle relaxation, and ensure you get enough sleep at night.
Social media detox will do miracles for you, especially if your screen time counter shows more than two hours a day. After all, your handheld device can do nothing better than keep your mind occupied with things that happen elsewhere, to people you barely know and don’t even like. So, why not invest these hours into yourself instead?
Analyzing your negative habits and thinking patterns might help in addressing them later. You can begin your journey with a professional well-being survey to get a snapshot of your current condition. After that, you can reflect on the results and do your own project for yourself – because you matter, and you matter a great deal.

At the end of the day, wanting to enjoy life is the first step toward actually enjoying it. Even your morning cup of coffee or tea can be more than just a wake-up routine. In fact, it might be your first sip of daily delight, as long as you plant that meaning into it.

How Can I Enjoy Life at Home?

If you’re a social butterfly, staying at home and doing nothing might not sound like the best day ever for you. But what if “doing nothing” turns into doing things for yourself, your environment, and your ability to enjoy your own company?

Here are a few brief ideas on how to enjoy life alone while staying home:

Get rid of the clutter. You don’t need to compete for a neat freak show – you just have to put away possessions that take too much space and mean nothing to you. You can clean and declutter your home yourself, or you can reach out to a friend or a cleaning company if cleaning makes you nervous. What matters is the result – a home that makes you feel… At home, you know.
Decorate it your way. If you’re into flowers and room plants – get plenty of them. If you’re into Van Gogh, buy a reproduction and hang it where you can see it. If you like scented candles, fluffy blankets, movie posters, or extra bookshelves – make sure you have them. Make your home not a place to spend the night but a place to live happily and in harmony with yourself.
Get a pet. If that’s your thing, of course. If it is, but you’re somehow still hesitating – make the move. A purring cat or a dog that’s always there to love the time spent with you is a kind of therapy itself. It’s an extra family member that gives your home a soul. And it’s a new friend that you will love unconditionally.
Set the atmosphere. It costs nothing to play your feel-good song list as an atmosphere while you’re home. It costs very little to put some printed pictures, dim lights, and grounding items here and there to build up the ambiance. And it pays off millions of times!

Last but not least – staying home does not necessarily mean staying in your pajamas. If you love your pajamas, that’s great. But putting on makeup, perfume, and fancy clothes can change how you feel about yourself if you need that change right now.

Wait… But Should I Enjoy Life at All Times?

Now, back to philosophy. Nowadays, social media, conventional media, lifestyle magazines, and life coaches run a perpetual race to represent absolute bliss as the ultimate goal in life. But what if you simply accept that all emotions matter, and not being okay is totally okay?

In fact, it’s a sign of good emotional health to let yourself experience your full spectrum of human feelings and sentiments. Canceling your grief, sorrow, disappointment, or occasional bad mood won’t make them go away. It will just make it harder for you to heal and move on.

Paradoxically or not, you can – in a weird way – enjoy all of your emotions, be them positive or not so positive. Because feeling it all means you’re living it all – and filtering your emotions into fake happiness means you’re numbing a large part of who you are as a human being.

So – no – being blissfully happy all the time and enjoying life like it’s your last day on Earth is not always achievable. It was never meant to be. And that’s what makes life fascinating! All you need to do is remember how to be fascinated.

What are the Most Important Signs of a True Friend?

July 14, 2022 Comments Off blog, Friendship

In all cultures, friendship is considered a greatly important interpersonal relationship that we all need to experience and maintain.

Having a true friend is a blessing, and you probably already know that. But like in any other relationship, having a healthy and satisfactory friendship requires effort from both sides.

Below, we discuss a topic everyone cares about, but many are not quick to discuss out loud – the signs of a true friend standing by your side.

How Can You Tell if Someone is Really Your Friend?

How you feel about yourself when you are with someone tells a lot about that person. A real friend will help you feel good enough and totally comfortable in your own skin without making any extra effort to achieve that. This is a sign that this person is a really good friend of yours and someone worth your reciprocal engagement.

When you are with a genuine friend, you will never feel judged. In fact, you will feel accepted exactly the way you are – with your positive and negative traits. If you can be your most authentic self around someone, then this someone is a valuable friend you can rely on.

Finally – another sign of true friendship is that you don’t feel like you need to pick your words carefully when you’re with someone else. You know that your friend is accepting you the way you are – you can share a burst of laughter, sadness, good news, and joyful moments. In any situation, your friend will encourage you without needing to ask for it.

What are the True Characteristics of a True Friend?

Spending time with a friend, sharing exciting news, or just sitting in silence is a unique experience where you connect on a different level with another human being.

Fortunately or not, quality shared moments are not the only and not the most fundamental aspects of having a true friend. Some other common characteristics you can find in every genuine friend include, for example:

They are empathetic. Listening to your friend and putting yourself in someone else’s shoes builds up empathy between you and strengthens your friendship. Sometimes we don’t need advice; we need someone to hear about our struggles and pay attention. You can always share your difficulties and happiness with your true friends, knowing they share the same emotions.

They are always ready to help. A true friend will always help you when in need, even if they are also in a bad situation. This is a very key moment in a friendship. Next time, don’t ask yourself, “who are my true friends” but ask yourself, “who is always ready to help me and at the same time he or she needs help.” A true friend is selfless, grounded, and caring.

A true friend keeps a secret. We all have secrets. Sometimes we need to share them without being judged, rejected, or afraid that our secrets might leak. Being able to share a secret with a friend is like taking a massive weight off your shoulders. Also, it would be best if you warned your friend – they can only respect your privacy if they know its boundaries.

How Do You Know if Someone Isn’t Your Friend?

Here are some signs you need to pay attention to if you want to determine who is not your genuine friend:

You feel tired and drained after hanging out with them. This is a very strong sign that these people are toxic and just consume your positive energy – consciously or not.

They make you feel less than them when you are around them. If you feel you are not worthy, you should stop hanging with those people. They are not your friends. A good friend will always make you feel good about yourself.

They are not available when you need them, but they are available when they need you. This is an obvious one, but it can be tricky to recognize in real life. People who are pretending to be always “busy” for you when you need them are not your friends. A good friend will always be there when you are in need.

They don’t show you respect as a person. If you feel like your friends don’t respect you as a human being with a set of characteristics, then they might not be your good friends. Think about the situations where they don’t accept your beliefs and viewpoints, but in a negative way. Everyone has an opinion. But if they make you feel you are stupid or less worthy for what you’re saying and thinking, then it’s a sign that they don’t respect you and they don’t deserve your trust. (1)

Who Is a True Friend?

It is natural to question your friendships. But pay attention to what exactly makes you wonder.

A true friend:

Will not trigger doubts in you about your friendship;
Will stand up for you;
Is honest and trustworthy;
Is not passive-aggressive towards you;
Accepts you and encourages you;
Celebrate your success;
Shares your sorrow;
Respects you and your boundaries.

Does it sound like someone you know? Then, you better treasure that person and do your best to do the same for them.

Do True Friends Really Exist?

Yes. True friends do exist. A true friend is someone ready to help and eager to give without expecting anything in return. Anyway, you return them their favor – because it’s what you honestly want and actually need to do.

If you feel like you haven’t met that kind of person in your life, you are wrong. Think about it – who is selflessly ready to give without expecting to receive? These are probably your parents. Even if you don’t have true friends, your parents will always be there for you.

At the end of the day, friends are the family you pick for yourself, which is something huge. So if you still haven’t found your clique, worry not – sometimes, it is better to learn how to live alone rather than with toxicity. But when you find them – cherish them and give them your best because it will all be worth it.

Emotional Recognition exercise will help you to recognize emotions and understand who is your real friend.

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Category: blog